I Don’t Have An MBA

I don’t want to be a businessperson.  I don’t want to calculate economies of scale.  I don’t want to maximize shareholder value.  I don’t want to be The Man, another empty suit prattling on about synergy and diversification to clients who wouldn’t know good business practices if they were hit in the face with a pie-chart laden power point presentation.

I am neither ambitious nor competitive.  I care not for accomplishments nor accolades.  My personality is not well suited to the cutthroat conference room.

If I found myself at a classy soirée surrounded by a rabid pack of recent MBA graduates and future titans of industry, I would be hard pressed to concurrently feign interest and chortle at sarcastic jokes about well known conglomerates I’ve never heard of.  So much so, that I fear I would not fully enjoy the 100 year old scotch, hand-rolled cigars, and pizza bagels borne aloft on swarovski crystal serving trays.

Business administration, strategy, and supply chain management are worth studying, if only to more fully understand how it all works.  However, it’s not my kind of thing, so I’ll play to my strengths elsewhere.

I’m not a businessman, I’m a business, man!

Let me handle my business, damn.


I Don’t Have An MBA

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